The illustrative struggle journal #4

The rolling stone.
Roadburn Festival work.
There they are. Projects! People approached me. Beer label design, Logo re-design for a band, a cover for some smart writings. Things are starting to roll. YES! But now I need to get things scheduled. I am working on some long term projects who need attention but they don't pay yet. I can't finish them in a week. It probably is going to take for about seven months from now to complete one of these projects. But you have to trust me, it is going to be amazing. For those who are reading this right now, just hang on. You are the one who know there is something happening at this very moment.

New big bosses
Something that is getting quite scary is the fact that I have to do stuff for other people. They are the ones who need to judge me. They are the people who are paying my bills because I do good work. The scary thing about all this is the fact that I can't f*ck it up. When I do it is a really bad thing for my name as a good Illustrator.
The one thing you have to do as an freelance artist is be different then all the others. I know I am different since I discovered that I drew a insane amount of corpses, deformed and tormented people for several proposes. I don't think many other illustrators did that and I don't really want to draw corpses for the rest of my life. It would be an achievement... but no, I would like to draw more "happy" stuff too. I can do more! But I don't know where I am going to at the moment but that is the exciting part of being an artist.
Anyway, I am trying to be different (in a other way besides drawing the morbid and occult shadows of life.) I HATE the image of illustrators and artists being not reliable. I try to reply to messages and emails as quick as possible and I ask everything I need to know to get things in the same mindset as my client. This is a message to everyone who reeds this and works as an illustrator too. ANSWER your emails and phone calls and make your deadlines.
This is good for your reliability and also for both your clients and your comfort. Your client knows what you are doing and you know that you are walking on the same path as your client.
Last advice I can give you about this. Don't fear to speak out your own visual vision and dare to take risks. Don't give a sh*t what other people things. You give people what they need, not what they want. That is why you are that special little motherf*cking snowflake.

Post mortem photography is a good example of offering something different what people needed. These days death is a taboo. You don't do things like this but someone back then thought this was something that a family needed and offered it to them. It became a new way of saying goodbye to your lost one.
CHAOS and what to do with your time!
A lot of you, and me too, has trouble with scheduling your day. I discovered that this is the hardest when you don't have the amount of deadlines to fill your day. When you don't have deadlines you have to kick yourself to work.
The question I expect now is 'But I don't have any clients at the moment, what should I do?'. That is easy. Be your own client. You are creative enough to draw or paint stuff. There are many things you really dislike in the design field. It is your responsibility to fix that. I really hate a lot of poster designs. A lot of posters I see are nothing more then a picture with a text placed on it. In some cases that is the thing to do but the lack of experimental ways to place the words in the image is something I think is really bad. That is why I want to make posters in a different way. The image has to show. I can't discover a lot of differences in poster designs. So that means one designer is not different from another. There are more reasons for that: Money, clients who fear change and don't dare to take risks, trends and so on. But YOU are the one who can make a change, be different than that trend and make your designs worth the money.
There are enough possibilities and you can do whatever you want! Take your freedom as an artist and keep your schedule.
The fact I am not following a really strict schedule anymore is something different. I don't think this works for me anymore. When I wake up I am making a vage schedule of things I want to finish that day. All to make the deadline. Doesn't matter how but you have to. That is your bread and butter.

But this is not my problem at the moment. I am working on several things and I want to finish stuff the best I can.

Another Fear.
Maybe a bit weird, but it actually is scary to be alone all the time. The only contact I have with the outside world is over the email and sometimes by phone. So my social skills are kind of dead at the moment. I'm not the most social skilled person anyway but I do like to have a talk about things. Being confronted with your own thoughts gives you a tunnel vision when looking at your art. You need to expend your mind so now and then by talking. That is why I would like to get replies on this blog entries. Maybe you totally disagree with me or you have any tips or thoughts about things I write over here. I like to hear my readers and fans.

Taking Breaks
This brings me to the second part of this fear. You have to take a break so now and then. I can't sit still at all. I always want to create things. That is not bad at all but you are going to destroy yourself when you are not taking any breaks and rethink everything you did or just don't think about anything art related at all. There is a reason why people have weekends and vacations!
This is where I end this entry, thank you for your time and I hope this helped you a bit further.

Don't hesitate to write a comment, speak out your mind and/or ask things! That helps me some steps further too!

Again thank you and ti'll next struggle!

~CAVUM~

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